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The Mediocre-ish Getaway

8/7/2009

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Since seeing A Perfect Getaway three days ago I've been mulling the  movie over in my head quite a bit because I couldn't figure out what to say about it. I knew I didn't  enjoy it, but I also knew there were plenty of mindless moviegoers out there who might. A Pefect Getaway was so bland it left me at a loss for words. I even checked Rotten Tomatoes to see if one of my fellow movie reviewers could inspire me (they couldn't) and was not surprised to find A Pefect Getaway at 47% - precariously perched in the middle of the road. This movie is just there - you won't be better or worse off for having watched it unless you're trying to impress a date and want to get laid. It is harmful to the overall quality of films in general but harmless fun at the same time.



A Perfect Getaway chronicles the Hawaiian honeymoon of newlyweds Cliff (Steve Zahn--why is he in this movie?) and Cydney (Milla Jovovich). Despite news of a double  murder on the main island and the police looking for a man and a woman, the couple decides to press on with their new friends Nick (Timothy Olyphant) and Gina (Kiele Sanchez) who, believe it or not, fit the description of the killers. The couples head deeper into the Hawaiian wilderness before the "twist of the summer" is revealed and shit gets weird.

Whats really weird is the directors choice to start using visual effects like a five-minute-long black and white flashback, slow motion and triple screen action as soon as the plot-twist is given away, which seemed like an effort to add to the action element of the film but it just came out clunky and forced. The same could be said for the casting. Olyphant, Jovovoich and Zahn are all entertaining actors but were each given the wrong role and fumbled their performances because of it. If the awkward casting was done in an effort to throw viewers off and set up the "twist," it didn't work. I must admit I enjoyed the script's clever references to the genre's never ending supply of red herrings and guys that are impossible to kill.

You know what would have made this movie better? More sex. Seriously, why would you have a trashy R-rated movie like this and not play up the boobs and abs? Sex sells.

--Mark Collins

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