Just, please don’t tell me, Ivan Reitman, that this film is a feminist romantic comedy. I might barf again.
No Strings Attached is the story of Adam (Kutcher), a lowly assistant on a Glee-esque TV show with a famous dad (Kevin Kline), who meets Emma (Natalie Portman), a medical intern who doesn’t want any romantic attachments. So, of course, the two decide to just have sex, no strings attached without the promise of feelings—or breakfast. Along for the ride are their goofy friends, Greta Gerwig, Ludacris, Jake M. Johnson, and Mindy Kaling. Can these two learn how to make sex uncomplicated without falling in love? Spoiler Alert: no, of course not.
Yes, No Strings Attached is insanely formulaic. Extremely. But it decides to up the rom com antics by trying to take on Judd Apatow with raunchy jokes. However, No Strings Attached feels more like SATC reruns on TBS: watered down and more sitcom-y. There’s really nothing raunchy or sex comedy about this film minus a few well-placed jokes about menstruation. Sure, I giggled a few times. I have to admit that Natalie Portman is actually funny. She is, by far, the best part of this film. Kevin Kline would take that prize if he was given more to do, but…alas.
And then there is Kutcher. He is…Ashton Kutcher, which is, to say, terrible.
But I fail to see how Reitman, a comedy master, deems No Strings Attached as a feminist romantic comedy. I get that it’s somehow empowering that women want sex, but it just makes the characters in this film out to be hard-heartened shrews who hate feelings.
No Strings Attached is a pretty "meh" film. It’s not terrible, but it’s not great. I’m glad Portman is in it rather than Katherine Heigl, but even she can’t save it from the awfulness that is Ashton Kutcher. I’m holding out for Friends with Benefits to get my raunchy rom com fill.
--Darcie Duttweiler