Like most moviegoers, I enjoy the trailers before a film, but there’s one thing during those pre-feature moments that makes my heart sink in my chest: when I turn to my date and see her smiling head nod in approval after a preview for an upcoming romantic comedy. Because of her, I see my fair share of romcoms. That’s how I found myself watching Life As We Know It. Lucky me.
The title implies that Life As We Know It has something to say about life, and maybe it does. Maybe the artistic statement Life is trying to make is that life isn’t funny—in fact, it’s often painful—and though you know how it’s going to end and you know you won’t like it, by the time you get to those final minutes, you’re just glad it’s over.
Or, some writer thought to himself, “Baby vomit? LOLZ.”
Self-gratification, Joan from Mad Men, and an unlikeable odd couple after the jump!
The title implies that Life As We Know It has something to say about life, and maybe it does. Maybe the artistic statement Life is trying to make is that life isn’t funny—in fact, it’s often painful—and though you know how it’s going to end and you know you won’t like it, by the time you get to those final minutes, you’re just glad it’s over.
Or, some writer thought to himself, “Baby vomit? LOLZ.”
Self-gratification, Joan from Mad Men, and an unlikeable odd couple after the jump!
Life, as you know it, is driven by the heart—specifically heartbeats, of which you can expect around 3 billion or so in your days on Earth. Two hours spent watching Life As We Know It will account for 8,500 of those heartbeats, heartbeats that could have served you better hiking through the mountains, reading poetry under the shade of a tree or vigorously masturbating in a public bathroom—all choices far more fulfilling than sitting through Life As We Know It.
The especially ridiculous premise of Life As We Know It is this: Messer (played by poor man’s Hugh Jackman, Josh Duhamel) is best buds with Peter; and Holly (Katherine Heigl, who has obviously never said no to a script in her entire life) is friends with Alison (Christina Hendricks, Joan from Mad Men). As some sort of audacious attempt at matchmaking or a particularly cruel practical joke, Peter and Alison decide that in the event of their simultaneous deaths, Messer and Holly—who can’t stand the sight of each other—should be legally tasked with caring for their one-year-old kiddo.
Messer, as his subtle nickname implies, is a messy, motorcycle-riding free spirit and a bit of a womanizer, leaving in his spray-on-tanned wake a trail of one-night stands and broken hearts. Holly is (big surprise) uptight and straight-laced, with her life entirely mapped out before her. She’s punctual, professional and disgusted by fun-loving Messer’s carefree attitude and sloppy lifestyle.
You can guess where it goes from there, and you’d be absolutely right.
Life shares with us the romcom gospel we’ve been brought up with since our childhood—feminism has left women emotional wrecks, capable of only selfishly focusing on their careers and personal betterment, when what they really need is a man. On their journey to love, a man will discover it takes more than promiscuous encounters with strangers to make him feel whole, and a woman will come to the understand that her quaint dreams of success should be canned in favor of fulfilling her destiny, i.e., baby-rearing.
Life As We Know It is an inanimate and uninspired exercise in by-the-numbers romcom dreck with weak chemistry (the largely female crowd at our screening actually snickered and scoffed at the film’s big “I love you” revelation), a largely unlikeable cast (the supporting actors showed signs of potential, but they’re rarely put to good use) and nothing to offer anyone but the most hardcore of romcom junkies—though, even my romantic comedy-obsessed girlfriend left disappointed and spent the majority of our walk to the car offering sincere apologies for suggesting we watch Life.
—Eric Pulsifer
The especially ridiculous premise of Life As We Know It is this: Messer (played by poor man’s Hugh Jackman, Josh Duhamel) is best buds with Peter; and Holly (Katherine Heigl, who has obviously never said no to a script in her entire life) is friends with Alison (Christina Hendricks, Joan from Mad Men). As some sort of audacious attempt at matchmaking or a particularly cruel practical joke, Peter and Alison decide that in the event of their simultaneous deaths, Messer and Holly—who can’t stand the sight of each other—should be legally tasked with caring for their one-year-old kiddo.
Messer, as his subtle nickname implies, is a messy, motorcycle-riding free spirit and a bit of a womanizer, leaving in his spray-on-tanned wake a trail of one-night stands and broken hearts. Holly is (big surprise) uptight and straight-laced, with her life entirely mapped out before her. She’s punctual, professional and disgusted by fun-loving Messer’s carefree attitude and sloppy lifestyle.
You can guess where it goes from there, and you’d be absolutely right.
Life shares with us the romcom gospel we’ve been brought up with since our childhood—feminism has left women emotional wrecks, capable of only selfishly focusing on their careers and personal betterment, when what they really need is a man. On their journey to love, a man will discover it takes more than promiscuous encounters with strangers to make him feel whole, and a woman will come to the understand that her quaint dreams of success should be canned in favor of fulfilling her destiny, i.e., baby-rearing.
Life As We Know It is an inanimate and uninspired exercise in by-the-numbers romcom dreck with weak chemistry (the largely female crowd at our screening actually snickered and scoffed at the film’s big “I love you” revelation), a largely unlikeable cast (the supporting actors showed signs of potential, but they’re rarely put to good use) and nothing to offer anyone but the most hardcore of romcom junkies—though, even my romantic comedy-obsessed girlfriend left disappointed and spent the majority of our walk to the car offering sincere apologies for suggesting we watch Life.
—Eric Pulsifer
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