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Not-so "Despicable Me"

7/7/2010

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Despicable Me
I wish there was a way for the little boy who sat behind me at Despicable Me to write this review. Because it shouldn't matter what I think; despite Hollywood's best efforts to make movies that appeal to both children and adults (the future father in me is very grateful for this), these movies are ultimately made for kids.

As a film critic I'm conditioned to analyze character development, cinematography, and a bunch of other crap that won't affect that little boy's enjoyment of the movie at all. While I sat calmly in my seat and watched the movie, he bounced around and squealed when it looked like 3D was popping off the screen. He giggled at fart jokes and laughed uninhibited when Dr. Gru's minions made a joke. He even rebuked the characters on the screen when they thought Dr. Gru wouldn't make it. "Oh yes he will!" he said loud enough for the entire theater to hear. And when you look at the movie from his perspective, it was pretty damn good!

It might not resonate with adults the way that Kung Fu Panda or Toy Story 3 did, but it is a fun, mindless escape. And for that reason I applaud it.

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Jay Baruchel is out of his league

3/12/2010

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I am typically of the mindset that famous funny guys aren’t any funnier than class clowns, they just happened to be in the right place at the right time. I’ve been to panels with Seth Rogan and Danny McBride, and I walked away thinking they weren’t any funnier than I was; they just had good writers and knew how to deliver their lines well.

She’s Out of My League has taught me how important actors really are. Writer John Anders and John Morris put together a nice story that, although predictable, lent itself to some funny situations. Unfortunately Jay Baruchel isn’t funny at all and should never be called upon to carry a movie. T.J. Miller, who plays his friend “Stainer,” is a homeless man’s Jon Heder that mucked up a bunch of jokes that should have been hilarious but came out flat. The whole time I kept thinking that if Paul Rudd and Will Ferrell were the leading men I would be laughing my ass off.

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Brooklyn's...eh...so so

3/4/2010

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It’s nearly impossible to go into a movie without preconceived notions these days. Not only does Hollywood love to rest on its laurels, it is also the only business that goes out of its way to point it out to you. Taglines such as ‘from the visionary director who brought you Training Day’ is basically like saying ‘this guy made a movie you really liked 9 years ago, and even though he has made six more that were so mediocre we’re not going to mention them here, this one is going to be his best work yet!’ Sorry, but that isn’t going to convince me to see a movie, it actually makes me nervous that the movie itself is so bad that you have to promote the director’s previous work over the actual movie itself.

Add in the reports that Brooklyn’s Finest is one of those films with a bunch of well-known actors came together and took a pay cut because they liked the script so much and wanted to work together, and you’ve got a recipe for a turd sandwich.


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The Mouse house goes old school with "The Princess and the Frog"

12/14/2009

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When Toy Story was released in 1995 moviegoers clamored to get a look at Disney’s first full-length computer animated film. It was new and exciting--something we hadn’t seen before and didn’t know was possible. What we didn’t realize at the time is that the film’s success signified a definitive end to the golden age of Disney animated films. As audiences fell in love with Buzz, Woody, Nemo, and Sulley, the quality of Disney’s other animated films plummeted. With forgettable titles like Atlantis and Tarzan it became apparent that the current generation of youngsters would grow old with computer animated memories. It didn’t help that nearly every other studio followed suit and jumped on the digital wave. Computers made it easy and cost-efficient to make an animated movie. Throw some money at a couple well-known actors, match their voices up with some talking animals and you’ve got a hit. (How else can you explain Open Season?)  

In a time where absolutely everyone is looking for the next big thing, Disney went back to the basics and proved why they are the worldwide leader in children's entertainment. The Princess and the Frog, Disney’s first hand-drawn animated film since 2003’s Brother Bear, is an instant classic. The magic is back with impressionistic animation that looks cutting edge despite using technology that is decades old. A voodoo sequence is downright psychedelic, and the art deco-inspired restaurant segment offers an explosion of vibrant colors. I didn’t expect the animation to look all that different but it’s been so long since we’ve seen anything like this that it really stands out. 

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Broken Embraces

12/9/2009

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We find ourselves in an era of American filmmaking where everything has to blow up, love stories are crammed down viewers’ throats, and minor hiccups are turned into major catastrophes by poor decision-making heroes—all in the interest of creating the largest profit margin possible in the shortest amount of time. The reports of the most recent record-setting Thursday night opening total are pushed to the next line only by the most recent “leaked” photos of next summer’s blockbuster hit. In times like these it’s nice to shift your attention overseas where little-known directors (to the general, movie-going U.S. public, at least) are making films for the sake of art rather than trying to turn a massive profit.

Such is the case in Pedro Almodóvar’sBroken Embraces, a Spanish film that doesn’t make a statement with its characters as much as it simply observes a very intriguing segment of their lives.

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Not half "Bad," this "Lieutenant"

11/19/2009

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I feel like Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans' director Werner Herzog would be proud of the way I first saw his movie. You see, Herzog claims to have never seen the original Bad Lieutenant starring Harvey Keitel that came out in 1992, and I dig his style. Despite one of the original writers penning the script for the 2009 rendition, Herzog still refused to check out the original. It’s not like he couldn’t have very easily ordered the DVD from Amazon; he just flat out didn’t want to see it. So the fact that I walked into the theater having watched the trailer for the original film and was still wondering when Keitel was going to show up right before the credits rolled, I’d say Herzog would be pleased.  

The reason I tell you all of this is because it's best to go into this film without any kind of expectations because, by not meeting your expectations, the film will far exceed them. What starts off as a serious, very dark, dramatic, and seemingly intense film devolves over the course of the movie into an uproarious comedic affair. But the disconnect between these two realms is steep; the first couple times you want to laugh but you almost feel like you shouldn’t. By the time Herzog has rolled out the extended iguana cameos you’ve chuckled a few times and you’ll almost wish you could go back and laugh harder at some of the stuff you couldn’t decide was funny or not in the beginning of the film. 

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Capitalism: A Movie Review

9/23/2009

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At this point in his career Michael Moore has transcended his role as
a filmmaker and turned himself into a boisterous character of his own
making. Much like Sacha Baron Cohen transforming into Borat or Brüno, as soon as the cameras are on Moore fully embraces his role as a bleeding heart liberal anxious to embarrass America's higher-ups and rub the country's nose in the mess he feels it has made. By interjecting himself into his films, he has cost himself the ability to make an honest-to-goodness documentary. For example, midway through Capitalism: A Love Story Moore calls one of the many rich, powerful men he has been lambasting to request an interview. Not only does Moore not get the interview, the secretary hangs up on him as soon as she hears his name. His character has become so one-sided that he couldn't even tell the other side of the story if he wanted to.

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Underdeveloped "Woodstock"

8/28/2009

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Whether you've seen Michael Wadleigh's iconic documentary Woodstock,
listened to one of many CD box sets or simply got caught talking to your hippie uncle at your family reunion, the mere mention of the Woodstock Music and Art Festival is more than enough to make even the most straight-laced businessman escape to a carefree time of dancing hippies and mind-expanding drugs. Nearly every account of the "Aquarian Exposition" has had the seemingly impossible task of capturing what it was like to be a part of the hippie throng. Like unique snowflakes that come together to create a blanket of snow, individual experiences at Woodstock are what made the three days of peace and music more than just another music festival.


In Taking Woodstock, director Ang Lee attempts to capture the individual experience of Elliot (Demetri Martin), the man who not only inadvertently made the festival a reality but also saw his life changed because of it. Wisely choosing to stay away from Jimi Hendrix and Janis Joplin look-alikes, Lee forgoes the music from the famous stage and instead focuses on the people living in the sleepy village of White Lake, New York before the hippie invasion took place. 

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"Thirsty" for more vampires?

8/14/2009

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With all the vampire hoopla in Hollywood these days it would be easy to write off Thirst as just another Twilight knock-off trying to cash in on the popularity of a genre whose better days may already be long gone. Lucky for us, Korean filmmaker Chan-wook Park has an entire ocean between him and the horridness that is Hollywood – leaving him alone to create a vampire movie that juxtaposes moral obligation with the carnal pleasures that vampires seem eternally unable to escape. And it very well may be the most beautiful love story I’ve ever witnessed.

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The Mediocre-ish Getaway

8/7/2009

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Since seeing A Perfect Getaway three days ago I've been mulling the  movie over in my head quite a bit because I couldn't figure out what to say about it. I knew I didn't  enjoy it, but I also knew there were plenty of mindless moviegoers out there who might. A Pefect Getaway was so bland it left me at a loss for words. I even checked Rotten Tomatoes to see if one of my fellow movie reviewers could inspire me (they couldn't) and was not surprised to find A Pefect Getaway at 47% - precariously perched in the middle of the road. This movie is just there - you won't be better or worse off for having watched it unless you're trying to impress a date and want to get laid. It is harmful to the overall quality of films in general but harmless fun at the same time.




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