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When you show up for a romantic comedy starring Jennifer Aniston, the phrase you least expect to read in the opening credits is “based on a short story by Jeffrey Eugenides.” How on earth did a story by a Pulitzer Prize winner become a rom com with the star of The Bounty Hunter? Beats me.

The Switch is the story of Wally (Jason Bateman) and his best friend Kassie (Aniston), who decides she wants to have a baby via artificial insemination. While Kassie picks the “goods” of Roland (Patrick Wilson), a hunky, blonde teacher, Wally accidentally gets super wasted and swaps out Roland’s sperm with his own (after a brief dalliance with a Diane Sawyer magazine cover). Kassie then moves away, only to return 7 years later with a son who bears a huge resemblance to Wally, which conjures up several of emotions with the neurotic loner.  Cue feelings and cute kids!

With romantic comedies, it can be very easy to write them off as formulaic and predictable. However, when you have a rom com starring funnyman Bateman, you expect something a little better. Unfortunately, The Switch doesn’t deliver. The movie isn’t bad—it’s far from unwatchable. Bateman is fairly funny, but he’s not given much to do other than play nice with a cute but neurotic kid, who is, yes, very adorable. Aniston is basically nonexistent in her role, as is Wilson.

There is a shining light in this movie, though, and his name is Jeff Goldblum. Shocker of the year, right? Goldblum reminded me very much of Ted Danson in HBO’s Bored to Death, and that’s a great compliment. He was easily the best part of The Switch as Wally’s coworker and narcissistic friend.  Juliette Lewis serves the same function as Kassie’s kooky friend who’s less likable than Goldblum.

I wish I had good news for Arrested Development fans, but The Switch is merely a mediocre movie starring a fun and charming actor and his scene-stealing, weird friend.  Goldblum totally owned this movie—too bad it had all that love and kid junk holding him down…

--Darcie Duttweiler


 
 
Step Up 3D
Remember those 3D movies you used to see in theme parks as a kid? You would spend the whole run time on the edge of your seat waiting for the next object to jump out at you. While Avatar created an entire universe that was complex, robust, and so…three dimensional, I can’t help but admit the longing I sometimes feel when watching a modern 3D movie for something to just….fucking jump out at me. Step Up 3D may not have the emotional depth of the likes of even Paul Blart: Mall Cop, but things (namely arms, bubbles, rain, and feet) fucking jump out at you.

And it’s awesome.

Read the full review AFTER the jump.